You want to stay sober. You want to experience the promises of a serene life. Many people who leave treatment have good intentions, but the cunning, baffling and powerful nature of the disease of chemical dependency causes them to relapse.
There are many steps taken before relapse actually happens. If you regularly note the signs that point the way for you, your chances of avoiding a relapse are much stronger.
The path is different for everyone and usually several signs are present. There is no particular order in which they appear, but if you see yourself going back and forth in these areas…beware! You may be on the path of relapse.
Relapse does not occur when you first begin to use. Relapse is a process that starts long before you actually return to using.
Just as chemical dependency is an illness that affected the physical, social and psychological aspects of your life, the path to relapse may have signs that appear in all areas of your life as well.
The first sign of relapse may be the feeling of stress. In healthy recovery, the reasons for the stress would be explored, and appropriate action would be taken. However, in the relapse process, there may be denial of the stress and denial of the source of the stress. Once a pattern of denial begins to grow, other old behaviors may be reactivated.
You may limit your use of recovery tools such as Twelve-Step meetings, phone calls to a sponsor or healthy sleeping, eating or exercise patterns.
Soon, you have left the pathway to recovery and slide down the path of relapse.
BUDD: Building up to drink or drug
| Silence - | change from being cheerful and talkative to being silent |
| Aimless talk - | illogically talking about anything |
| Overactive - | constant anxiety |
| Exhaustion - | extreme fatigue |
| Remorseful - | easily moved to tears |
| Irritability - | inability to stay still, little things bother them |
| Boredom - | listless, irritated with others |
| Isolation - | withdrawn, non-communicative, hides out |
| Overconfidence - | euphoric, says sobriety will last forever |
| SIGNS | YES | NO | |
| * | My behavior becomes rigid and I try to plan the outcome ahead of time. I shy away from any spontaneous activity. | ||
| * | I begin to spend more time alone. I stay away from friends who support my recovery and I make no effort to make new friends. | ||
| * | I keep track of the drinking and using patterns of others. I judge who should stop drinking and who will relapse. | ||
| * | I blow up and make big deals out of minor situations. | ||
| * | I slow down my regular program of recovery including Twelve-Step meetings. | ||
| * | I begin eating in unhealthy ways. I replace nourishing food with junk food. I skip meals or eat all of the time. | ||
| * | I quit my regular program of exercise. | ||
| * | I begin to tell lies. | ||
| * | I stop organizing my daily life and just let things happen. | ||
| * | I spend time with old or new drinking or using buddies or hang out at places that encourage my use. | ||
| * | When I have thoughts of drinking or using again, I block them from my mind and pretend they were never there. | ||
| * | My thoughts move to perfect or grandiose plans for me. | ||
| * | I start to think about drinking or using again in the future. | ||
| * | I begin to think I may have been misdiagnosed and I am really not addicted to alcohol or other drugs. | ||
| * | Sometimes my brain just seems to shut off and I can't make sense of anything. | ||
| * | I think that nobody really understands me and what I have gone through. | ||
| * | When people close to me inquire about my behavior, I am defensive and often go on the attack. | ||
| * | I start to put some of the blame of my own feelings and behavior on other people. | ||
| * | I start to be dishonest in my words and actions with others. | ||
| * | I shy away from people who have shown an interest in my recovery. | ||
| * | I become less dependable, and I don't follow up on my responsibilities to others. | ||
| * | I become unrealistic on my demands of other people's time or loyalty. | ||
| * | I start to socialize with people who drink or use. | ||
| * | I get down on myself more often and for longer periods of time. | ||
| * | I start to feel trapped and wonder whether my recovery is worth all the hassle and restrictions. | ||
| * | I begin feeling as if I'm putting on a false act for people rather than being my natural self. | ||
| * | I am often angry at myself, at other people and at things in general. | ||
| * | I have feelings of helplessness and desperation. | ||
| * | I feel bored, as if my life will never have "zip" to it again. | ||
| * | Sometimes my whole body feels like it is craving alcohol or another mood-altering drug. | ||
| * | I can't get a restful night's sleep. I wake up at odd hours or just sit in bed. | ||
| * | I always feel tired and listless. I don't have energy to complete even simple tasks. | ||
| * | I always seem to be getting sick. I have a cold or the flu or a headache most of the time. | ||
| * | Sometimes my body feels numb, like I have no feelings whatsoever. | ||
| * | I get discouraged that my body is in such poor shape. I will never feel fit and healthy again. | ||
| * | I begin to rely solely on my own self-will to stay free of alcohol or other drugs. | ||
| * | I quit having peaceful moments of meditation or prayer. | ||
| * | I stop trusting in a Higher Power. I begin to feel lost and hopeless and feel as if I'm barely hanging onto my sobriety. | ||
| * | I become angry or sarcastic at any mention of a spiritual way of living. | ||
| * | I think that people who need a Higher Power are just weak. | ||
| If you answer "Yes" to four or more of these symptoms, please talk to a qualified person to get back on track. |
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